The Modern Rules For Matchmaking
Even in these days of eHarmony and Match.com, there are advantages to meeting people through family and friends. Online dating sites can help you find thousands of people you would be unlikely to come across in your daily life. However, your loved ones may also have insight into who would be a compatible partner for you.
Maybe you’re hankering to introduce your plumber to your tennis instructor. Maybe you dream about your best friend’s cousin. Try these tips for setting up a date or being set up on one.
How to Set Your Friends Up on a Date
1. Ask for permission. Find out whether your friend is interested in dating. She may be healing from a recent divorce or consumed with launching a new business. If the timing is off, maybe she’ll still appreciate your thoughtfulness and get back to you when her situation changes.
2. Rehearse your introduction. Explain why you think two people would be a good match. Do they share a love for opera or volley ball? Do they both want to marry and live outside the city?
3. Listen closely. One of the most effective ways to figure out what would make your friends click is to pay attention to them. The things they talk about could reveal what they want.
4. Share a photo. Your coworker’s definition of gorgeous could be very different from your own. Present a photograph to avoid misunderstandings.
5. Check your motives. If you’re secretly attracted to someone, it’s easy to let those feelings persuade you to pair them up with someone else. Ensure that you’ll be happy for the new couple if things work out.
6. Stand back. You’re probably going to be curious about whatever happens on the first date. Learning a few details is intriguing. Becoming too involved is disruptive.
7. Live and learn. If your first match fails to ignite, refine your strategy. Experience and practice makes you more insightful.
How to Be Set Up on a Date
1. Advertise your availability. Taking out a billboard would be extreme, but it’s okay to let your loved ones know you want to meet new suitors. That way, they can be on the lookout for you.
2. Let go of expectations. We’re often unclear about how to build a lasting relationship. Relax and enjoy each other’s company on a date. If you’re compatible, the chemistry may emerge gradually.
3. Talk face to face. Getting together for a cup of coffee beats texting when it comes to forming a more accurate impression of someone. Focus on real world interactions.
4. Behave courteously. Etiquette matters online. It’s even more important when you have mutual friends. Smile, make eye contact, and speak kindly.
5. Decide on a second date. The only thing you need to figure out on most first dates is whether you would like to see each other at least one more time. If you find someone appealing, let them know.
6. Hire a professional. You may also want to try working with a paid matchmaking service. Browse for options online or in your neighborhood. Study contracts carefully before signing.
7. Try again. A happy relationship is worth searching for. Express your gratitude to your friends so they’ll keep sharing their contacts. Read about relationships and communication skills so you’ll be ready for love wherever you encounter it.
If finding a romantic partner is important to you, look for love in multiple places. Find your next date over the internet or through your next door neighbor. It can be fun and rewarding to bring couples together whether you’re arranging a match or being set up yourself.